Childhood Wounds

Childhood wounds:

Overview: our relationship with our parents depicts the kinds of wounds we develop that have an affect on our self confidence, self love, Fears, and reasons for our Limiting beliefs. If we heal our childhood wounds, then we can heal the mental afflictions that are inside our minds.

It is possible to have more than one wound existing within ourselves. We carry our child with us. Every stage we have gone through we have created a layer. If we heal our childhood wounds, we heal generational trauma that has been passed down to us. Our "Bad Parents" were created to be the way that they are because they too have unhealed wounds and have not been taught better. And so, we have for many generations been passing unhealed ancestral trauma to our children causing people to become closed off from one another and depressed and anxious to even attempt real human connection out of fear of being hurt.

Types of childhood wounds:

Injustice

It originates when our parents were rigid or cold, imposing an authoritarian and disrespectful educational style towards us. A constant demand generated us a feeling of injustice and feelings of worthlessness; forming rigid adults with communication deficiencies and difficulties when accepting different ways of being or opinions. They are based on their own belief and value system, expressed as moral judgments and absolute truths.

Due to a need to gain power and social importance based on excessive order and perfectionism, we must heal this wound by working on mental rigidity, cultivating tolerance and respect for a diversity free of judgment, flexibility and trust towards others. We must pay special attention to the free expression of feelings, the acceptance of what is different and the reconstruction of empathy.

Rejection

Rejection is a type of wound that comes along with a feeling of non-acceptance and dismissal. It is one of the deepest emotional wounds that affects people from within. Factors that often give rise to this fear in kids is rejection by family or relatives. It makes one feel unwanted, worthless and undeserving of love, which is why when they grow up they may choose to alienate themselves so as to avoid rejection.

Abandonment

This childhood wound arises out of the fear of loneliness. It takes shape generally between the ages of 0 to 3 either due to the physical absence of one or both parents or because of negligence. Therefore, abandonment is a wound that can be triggered accidentally or intentionally. A person who is affected by this wound may grow up to be dependent on others, while lacking the ability to trust. can suffer emotional dependence, a tendency to self-sabotage, we tolerate excessively in order not to be left alone Therefore, it is extremely important to heal and give oneself the time to overcome the negative emotions. 

We can heal this wound by working this fear of loneliness. The one who fears abandonment is the inner child, not the adult; so we must connect with our inner child and validate, embrace him / her, and reinforce self esteem, embrace his / her nature and reinforce his / her self-esteem in order to feel more secure and capable. By dedicating quality time to ourselves, we will demolish the fear of emotional openness and move closer to reconciliation with oneself. We must work on effective relationships and learn to be alone before starting other relationships.

Humiliation in which kids have grappled with constant embarrassment and criticism. Parents manage to instill a fear of failure in children telling them that they are either bad or good for nothing. Being continuously mocked and nagged for every action they take often takes a toll on their self-esteem and confidence. We underestimate ourselves, we feel guilty about everything and we forget our needs, in order to please others. Without realizing it, we end up believing that our self-recognition depends on the image that others have of us.

This fear often follows the child to adulthood and can lead to negative personalities. Either a child could grow up to become dependent on people's validation or could make them a bully who likes to humiliate others for self-satisfaction.

We can heal this wound by letting go of the heavy burden of humiliation and guilt, setting limits and respect, forgiving people who hurt us, and forgiving ourselves; reconciling ourselves with the past so that we can begin to value ourselves as the person we are and take responsibility now as adults.

Rejection is a feeling of non-acceptance and dismissal.It makes one feel unwanted, worthless and undeserving of love, which is why when they grow up they may choose to alienate themselves so as to avoid rejection. we end up cultivating self-loathing.

We can heal this wound by beginning to value ourselves and recognize ourselves for what we are, a valuable and unique being, relativizing that internal negative criticism and transforming it into positive constructive strategies. We must work our insecurities, gaining more confidence and respect for ourselves, in order to cultivate our self-love.

Betrayal This type of wound fosters in children when their parents never keep their promises. Kids with this emotion would have trouble trusting people, often leading to negative feelings. As they grow up, they may become extremely controlling, wanting everything to work according to their plan feelings of mistrust and isolation; that may have resulted in resentment or envy over time. This wound builds strong, possessive, distrustful, or controlling personalities; out of necessity not to feel cheated again. We value fidelity and loyalty, although from distorted visions as a result of experience, which make us not know how to respect the limits or the space of others.

We can heal this wound by working tolerance, patience, trust and the delegation of responsibilities to others; being consistent with our words and actions, being sincere without promising in vain, and always keeping the promises we make to ourselves and to others.

We have lived with these wounds for so long that we can often forget they are there. We just react to situations or people in a way we think is normal because we lived this way for many years. But once we start to experience unhappy marriages, loss of connection with our kids, or depression from our lives and even anxiety, the. We start to turn to ourselves and look within. Why am I this way? Why can't I just be happy with life and with my loved ones? The answer is because we haven't healed our childhood wounds! 

If you are ready to accept help and work to heal these wounds that can appear in childhood and even later in life from having an abusive or traumatic relationship with someone, this can be best done with a spiritual life coach. A spiritual or holistic life coach is someone that looks at the whole. They are able to recognize the affects the emotional wounds have on the body that overall affect the spirit. Healing your emotional wounds can open a new door of health and vitality! Peeling back those years of layers of fear and negative emotions will bring back your spirit or natural state so that the person inside can shine bright and you can appreciate yourself and love yourself without fear!

Turn To The Sun Holistic Therapies offers 1 on 1 in person or online coaching sessions with Spiritual Life Coach Jaslyn Flores Salgado. 

Don't put behind the opportunity to live a life without fear of being happy and finding peace. The longer you wait to heal a wound, the more severe damage it can cause on your mental, physical and emotional health!